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08 July 2010 @ 02:32 pm
It seems that our planet has been deemed a safe haven to species in the Galaxy that primarily homes humanoid insects. Several of the aliens that have arrived are the Bees, Mosquitoes, Praying Mantises, Ants, and the Crane Flies. I expect that there will be even more arriving within the next few days. It seems that we have no choice but the open our borders to them because we can't risk the slaughter of our guards by the more vicious of the incoming species. There are several things that we should all keep in mind when interacting with our new found allies. Unlike Sharks and Jellyfish, they're pretty impersonal and even lack their own names.

1. Mosquitoes. They bite. Don't be alarmed because they're generally harmless. It's sort of...their way of greeting you.  They often have a hard time speaking to you before they bite you because they're too busy thinking about what your blood might taste like. It's like they're distracted or something.  The bites do not hurt.

2. Bees. Bees are soft. They are sweet and very social. They're incredibly docile; however, they will sting you when threatened so please do not provoke them. They will die if they use their stinger.

3. Ants. They live underground and generally mind their own business. But be aware that they will kill you if you impose on their territory. There are red ants and black ants.

4. Crane Flies.  They always behave as if they are very drunk. They're incredibly harmless and will mostly just run into things. Don't mind them.

5. !!!IMPORTANT!!! Praying Mantises. A species of mostly females. After mating, they murder their partner by removing their head. There is no exception to this rule. Please do not have sex with a Praying Mantis despite how beautiful they are and how much they may try to convince you.

6. Leech. There is a leech that is wandering the planet. He bites for a really long time and sucks your blood. However, he asks. He might not respect your response, but it's worth a try saying no. The wound he leaves will not heal very well and so you should get medical attention as soon as you can.

7 Cricket & Water Skeeter. A married couple. Very sweet and harmless.

8. House Flies. They spit on things before they eat. They also excessively feel people. I don't know about them very much but they seem friendly enough. 

9. Slug. Very slow, very harmless.

10. Scorpions.

I'll update this list as we get more visitors.

-- Vice-Commander in Chief, Hotel 0925 
July 8th 2071